Wooden bed frames near me
2013.09.27 15:19 necrosatanic Shabby Chic
A place for people who love the style to congregate and share their recent purchases or finds.
2012.11.27 06:41 TANK23415 Good Guy Turtle
The Official Subreddit for the Good Guy Turtle Meme!
2015.06.03 06:16 Electromagnetic Hypersensitivity
Electromagnetic Hypersensitivity is an officially recognized disability in Sweden (this is not recognized as an illness because no diagnosis exists for this condition).” Professor Johansson gave the example of a head ache “ how can one measure the pain or prove the existence of a head ache?” Sweden ranks in the top 10 in the world for healthcare. Magnetic Flux poses the largest threat to individuals with EMHS.
2023.03.21 08:26 rose27477 Cleaning cat litterbox
Hi everyone, sorry in advance for the long post! I wasn’t sure what subreddit to put this in, but thought this was a good start as I’ve seen others with struggles similar to mine ask for advice on here and receive good help. So I currently struggle with OCD and anxiety that is especially around contamination, which many would think means you automatically clean everything intensely, but for me it’s almost the opposite, where I’m not being able to clean because the things are dirty and becomes dirtier over the longer it is not as cleaned. I also get nervous with chemicals in cleaners. It’s something I’m working with but really struggling with a lot of my cleaning things I should do I just avoid and it builds up. I also struggle with depression which brings me lack of motivation and also just hard to clean things on top of that.
Recently my biggest thing is the cat litter box. I have had my cat for longer than I have been diagnosed/had issues with the cleaning, but it has really started more this past year. I still take care of my cat as well as I can (it is healthy and cared for, vet visits, well-fed, water available, cuddles and play), but I really struggle with its litter box. I clean out the cat poop/pee as much as I can, but it has been more weekly/biweekly since I’ve struggled with this more. (Please don’t judge or anything, I know it’s not great for the cat. I do have two litter boxes for it and it always chooses to go into the smaller, dirtier one, and the larger, newer one has barely anything in it by the time I clean the litter boxes so the cat doesn’t have the choice of only using more dirty litter boxes if that makes sense? I don’t know why it chooses to use the dirtier one but I know cat behavior is not the focus of this sub).
Anyways, I know you should deep clean and replace litter in the litter box at least monthly, but I probably have not done that in more than half a yeaa year (I don’t remember last time but probably time between me switching apartments). My cat gets fresh litter on top of the dirty for the most part when it gets lower and the other litter box is newer by a few months and has fresher litter from being newer by those months. But anyways, I really want to get a handle on this (amongst other cleaning things) for me and my cat and start fresh. I want to throw away the old litter boxes as it will be easier to start fresh that way and not overwhelm myself, but I’m worried about bringing the dirty litter and litter box through the apartment because the layout has the door right next to the kitchen area and eating area. Also, the litter boxes are unfortunately right next to my bed because that’s the only good space for them in the apartment so I get nervous about them being there and dragging them out and the old litter and the dust possibly getting places.
My question would be is there anything special I need to do in the process of throwing the old litterbox away to make sure my apartment is safe/clean with the different areas such as the kitchen area and eating and places? Also, what would you recommend to do to clean the space after? I plan on putting the boxes in big garbage bags, and then I think dumping the current litter in a big garbage bag too and putting that one in the litter box bag, then taking it down to the dumpster in the garage, but I don’t know if that’s enough to keep the dirty litter and cat poop germs from getting in other places. With it being really old litter does that make it any more dangerous germ-wise that I would need to do something more to make sure I clean the space from when I vacuum after as well? I’m hoping to use an old vacuum if needed to clean up the carpet space and throw out the litter mats I have under the boxes right now to start completely fresh, but that’s similar to same questions above. I have a new litter genie that I use because I recently took the old one out that had months of the cat poop in it, but I don’t know if I’d need to take that one out too to really start over cleaner. I also don’t know if there is anything else I should do aside from that plan so far. Would I need to deeper clean the bed/desk area surrounding? I also have clothes in storage underneath the bed but don’t know if it’s overboard to have to do anything with them.
Also, I know this is an odd question, as I don’t really know where else to ask it besides the ocd subreddit as well, but this may be a different perspective and knowledge base to help. My mind has really thrown off what is needed for cleaning with OCD, so I know some of this may seem silly. But please let me know your thoughts on what steps or any advice if you can, and I appreciate any help/support!
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2023.03.21 08:26 dice1899 LFMW Rebuttal, Part 9: The Early Church – The Witnesses [B]
Posts in this series (note: link will not work properly in old Reddit or 3rd-party apps): https://www.reddit.com/lds/collection/363e4ce4-8cec-40ad-8ea9-5954cf1fe52d Last week, I briefly mentioned some of the insults and ill-treatment that have come my way because of writing these posts. One of the primary accusations made against me was that I was trying to make a name for myself. This couldn’t be further from the truth.
I have personally advertised these posts a grand total of six times: when I made my first Reddit post regarding the CES Letter, I went to a private LDS-related sub with about 30 active members and asked that if anyone had anything further they’d found, to share it in the comments of the post; when FAIR asked if they could repost them, I linked to the first one on my Facebook account and told my friends for the first time what I’d been doing for the past six months; I also mentioned when FAIR and Jennifer Roach each graciously invited me onto their podcasts; I announced this current series on Facebook; and I thanked FAIR for giving me an award at last year’s Conference, as well as all of the people who had been so supportive of me to that point. That’s it.
While I’m incredibly grateful to FAIR for giving me a wider platform and I’m very proud of the work I’ve put out, my goal was never to get attention for myself. I haven’t been searching out ways to put myself in the spotlight. I wasn’t even the one who approached FAIR; it was the other way around. In my offline life, I’m pretty shy and introverted, and attention actually makes me uncomfortable. It’s been an adjustment these past few years, with people suddenly knowing my name and recognizing my face. I don’t regret putting my real name to my writing and numerous blessings have come my way because of it. I’ve made a lot of friends, and the FAIR audience is generous and amazing and inspiring. But honestly, it hasn’t been easy and it wasn’t my intention.
I had five goals when writing the original CES Letter series:
1) To say that yes, these questions actually have been answered, and to share a few of those answers
2) To offer up a bunch of resources people could use to investigate the truth for themselves and find their own answers
3) To teach people how to evaluate sources and rank them according to their reliability and trustworthiness
4) To teach people how to study with the Spirit by their side, and
5) To point out manipulation tactics and fallacies commonly used by critics in their attacks
Ultimately, my intent was always to teach people how to maintain and grow their faith in Christ and in His restored gospel.
And you know what? Intention matters. It’s why I spent time at the beginning of each of these blog series delving into the background and prior statements of the authors whose documents we’re discussing. It’s why I give background information on some of the notable figures that come up. It’s why we need to learn how to evaluate sources in the first place.
A hostile source has a bias and an agenda. So does a friendly source, and so does a neutral source. Jeremy Runnells and Thomas Faulk have a bias and an agenda against the Church. I have a bias and an agenda in favor of the Church. You need to know that going into this material. Their intention is to tear down your faith. Mine is to build up your faith. I’ve been upfront about that right from the beginning. Have they? Because that’s information that you can use while evaluating our reliability and trustworthiness. Which of us is hiding information from you? Which of us is cutting quotes out of all context to give a false impression? Which of us is telling you to trust them, and which is telling you to trust God, the ultimate source of truth?
I’m bringing this all up because today’s topic involves accounts written by sources that need to be treated with caution. However, Thomas Faulk presents them as being completely truthful. Understanding how to evaluate sources is critical, and it’s only going to become more so as the years go by.
We all know that we can’t trust everything we read on the internet. Or, at least, we should know that. But for some reason, a lot of otherwise very smart, capable people don’t hold history books to the same standard. They need to. People make mistakes, and people have biases that aren’t always immediately clear.
You know the saying, “History was written by the winners”? That’s true. Historians have agendas, too. For a prime example of this, you don’t need to look any farther than D. Michael Quinn’s thoroughly debunked Same-Sex Dynamics Among Nineteenth-Century Americans: A Mormon Example.
In today’s chunk of the LFMW, Faulk picks up with a discussion about the Eight Witnesses:
On March 25, 1838, Martin Harris testified in public that none of the 3 or 8 witnesses saw or handled the physical plates. That’s a mischaracterization of what we know.
After the fall of the Kirtland Safety Society bank in 1837, most of the Saints left Kirtland in early 1838. By the time this meeting occurred, a faction led by Warren Parrish had taken control of the temple with the intent, according to George A. Smith, “to renounce the Book of Mormon and Joseph Smith, and take the ‘Mormon’ doctrines to overthrow all the religions in the world, and unite all the Christian churches in one general band, and they to be its great leaders.” He also said, “One of them told me that Moses was a rascal and the Prophets were tyrants, and that Jesus Christ was a despot, Paul a base liar and all religion a fudge. And Parrish said he agreed with him in principle.”
Eventually, a growing division between the members of the faction came to a head, and they held a meeting to determine the validity of the Book of Mormon and other revelations Joseph received. This is the meeting referred to in Burnett’s letter.
I’m going to briefly skip ahead in the LFMW, just so the rest of this explanation makes sense:
A letter on Josephsmithpapers.org dated April 15, 1838, Stephen Burnett wrote the following to Lyman Johnson: Burnett was a member of Parrish’s band of dissenters, and believed that Martin Harris recanted his testimony during this speech. Parrish agreed with his assessment, though George A. Smith, who was in town during the meeting, reported the opposite. He said that Harris testified in favor of the Book of Mormon’s truthfulness, and said that anyone who rejected it would be damned.
“I have reflected long and deliberately upon the history of this church and weighed the evidence for and against it — loth to give it up — but when I came to hear Martin Harris state in public that he never saw the plates with his natural eyes only in vision or imagination, neither Oliver [Cowdery] nor David [Whitmer] and also that the eight witnesses never saw them and hesitated to sign that instrument for that reason, but were persuaded to do it, the last pedestal gave way, in my view our foundations was sapped and the entire superstructure fell a heap of ruins, … I was followed by W. [Warren] Parish, Luke Johnson and John Boynton, all of who concurred with me. After we were done speaking, M[artin] Harris arose and said he was sorry for any man who rejected the Book of Mormon for he knew it was true, he said he had hefted the plates repeatedly in a box with only a tablecloth or handkerchief over them, but he never saw them only as he saw a city through a mountain. And said that he never should have told that the testimony of the eight was false, if it had not been picked out of air but should have let it passed as it was.” (http://josephsmithpapers.org/paperSummary/letterbook-2?p=69)
According to a Church Institute Manual handout, “Martin Harris strongly objected to how Burnett described his testimony and ‘remained a convinced Book of Mormon believer.’” The quote is taken from Richard L. Anderson’s fantastic book, Investigating the Book of Mormon Witnesses:
We are of course seeing Harris through the mind of a frustrated intermediary, one who thinks Mormonism presents a “whole scene of lying and deception.” He thinks that Martin Harris has not really seen the plates. If “only in vision,” then Burnett (not Harris) says it was really just “imagination.” If the Three Witnesses “only saw them spiritually,” then Burnett (not Harris) can explain it as essentially “in vision with their eyes shut.” But Martin Harris felt misrepresented, or he would not have stood up in the Kirtland Temple to challenge the explanations of Burnett and his disaffected associates. Note that there are two distinct experiences of Harris: (1) “he said that he had hefted the plates repeatedly in a box with only a tablecloth or handkerchief over them, but he never saw them, only as he saw a city through a mountain”; (2) “he never saw the plates with his natural eyes, only in vision.” Getting at the real Martin Harris requires subtracting Burnett’s sarcasm that seeps into the above wording. … In other words, Burnett heard Martin say that he had seen the plates in vision, and when Burnett uses “only” four times to ridicule the experience, that shows his disbelief, not Martin’s speech. Martin’s candid denial of seeing the plates while translating was sometimes exaggerated into a denial of ever seeing the plates, but even Burnett reports Martin claiming two types of contact with the plates: lifting them thinly covered, plus later seeing them in the hands of the angel. So Burnett paraphrased Martin Harris with the evident rationalizations of a skeptic. But Martin knew his own experience and remained a convinced Book of Mormon believer. Study of his interviews shows how strongly he insisted that the sight of the angel and plates was as real as the sight of the physical objects around him…. In fact, Burnett’s own letter says that when Harris realized how Burnett and others interpreted his testimony, he stood back up and testified of the Book of Mormon, them said that his previous comments had been “picked out” of him under duress.
Now, there is a slight discrepancy on what this letter actually says. The Joseph Smith Papers Project transcribes this line as “picked out of air.” However, in his Early Mormon Documents, Volume 5, Dan Vogel transcribes it as “picked out of [h]im.” When you zoom in on the text, it’s hard to tell exactly what it says. Either way, though, the point is clear that in Burnett’s own words, Harris felt like he’d been forced into making whatever statement he may have made about the Eight Witnesses.
So, since none of these are firsthand accounts from Harris himself, we have to try to judge the sources on their merits. Burnett and Parrish claim Harris said one thing, Smith felt he said something else. And, as was just pointed out, Burnett’s letter later shows Harris agreeing with Smith.
Personally, to me, it sounds like Burnett and Parrish mischaracterized the situation. Regardless of where you land on that, however, it’s obvious that the actual situation is a lot more questionable than Faulk’s proclamation makes it seem. The following sentence actually comes in between the first sentence I quoted from Faulk and the letter:
This statement caused apostles Luke S. Johnson, Lyman E. Johnson, John F. Boynton, high priest Stephen Burnett and LDS Seventy Warren Parish to leave the church. This is factually untrue. They left the Church because of the failure of the Kirtland Safety Society. As most of the people listed in that sentence were apostles at the time, their departures from the Church are well-documented.
Luke Johnson denounced Joseph alongside Warren Parrish and many others in late 1837 and at that point resigned from the Church. He was formally excommunicated alongside his brother Lyman E. Johnson and David Whitmer on April 13, 1838.
That denunciation took place shortly after December 10, 1837. All of those listed by Faulk were among those who denounced Joseph at this time. The History of the Church had this to say about it:
I returned to Kirtland on or about the 10th of December. During my absence in Missouri Warren Parrish, John F. Boynton, Luke S. Johnson, Joseph Coe, and some others united together for the overthrow of the Church. Soon after my return this dissenting band openly and publicly renounced the Church of Christ of Latter-day Saints and claimed themselves to be the old standard, calling themselves the Church of Christ, excluding the word “Saints,” and set me at naught, and the whole Church, denouncing us as heretics, not considering that the Saints shall possess the kingdom according to the Prophet Daniel. Remember, The History of the Church was written to sound like it was Joseph speaking, but there’s no guarantee this paragraph was actually taken from his own words. It may have been the recollection of someone else entirely that was rewritten to sound like Joseph’s voice.
John F. Boynton was excommunicated in 1837. So was Warren Parrish. In fact, between July and August of 1837, Parrish was the one who led the armed riot inside the Kirtland Temple, an incident in which Boynton participated. They were well out of the Church before that letter of Burnett’s was ever written.
The only one whose timeline of apostasy is at all murky is Stephen Burnett. Most sources just say that he apostatized “by 1838.” He was one who participated in that denunciation of Joseph in December of 1837, but it’s unclear whether he actually left the Church at this point or within the next few months of early 1838.
There was no love lost between Burnett and Joseph. In the Elder’s Journal from August 1838, Joseph described Burnett as an “little ignorant blockhead ... whose heart was so set on money that he would at any time, sell his soul for fifty dollars and then think he had made an excellent bargain; and who had got wearied of the restraints of religion, and could not bear to have his purse taxed.”
So, clearly, by the time April 1838 rolled around, Burnett and Parrish were both incredibly hostile toward the Church and particularly toward Joseph Smith. That bias has bearing on how we should view their characterization of the meeting featuring Martin Harris, just like Richard L. Anderson explained above.
And let’s not forget the words of Martin Harris himself:
[N]o man ever heard me in any way deny the truth of the Book of Mormon, the administration of the angel that showed me the plates; nor the organization of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, under the administration of Joseph Smith Jun., the prophet the Lord raised up for that purpose, in these the latter days, that he may show forth his power and glory. The Lord has shown me these things by his Spirit–by the administration of holy angels–and confirmed the same with signs following.... A similar point was made by John Whitmer, the next Witness we’re going to discuss:
I have never heard that any one of the three or eight witnesses ever denied the testimony that they have borne to the Book as published in the first edition of the Book of Mormon. There are only two of the witnesses to that book now living, to wit., David Whitmer, one of the three, and John Wh[itmer], one of the eight. Our names have gone forth to all nations, tongues and people as a divine revelation from God. And it will bring to pass the designs of God according to the declaration therein contained. These men were firm in their testimonies. Each one of them died still declaring their testimonies to the world.
On April 5, 1839 member of the Church, Theodore Turley, challenged John Whitmer, one of the 8 witnesses, to either affirm or deny his testimony regarding the gold plates. Whitmer responded by saying “I now say, I handled those plates ... they were shown to me by a supernatural power.” (History of the Church, vol.3 p307). According to the 1828 Webster’s Dictionary, “supernatural” was synonymous with “miraculous” in Joseph’s day. The Witnesses appeared at various times to use the word to mean/Chapter3#Question:_What_did_the_Book_of_Mormon_witnesses_mean_when_they_used_the_word.22supernatural.22_to_describe_their_experiences.3F) “by the power of God.”
As FAIR explains/Chapter3#Question:_Did_John_Whitmer.2C_one_of_the_Eight_Witnesses.2C_actually_say_that_he_saw_the_plates_by_a.22supernatural_power.22.3F), three years before this report by Turley, John Whitmer said:
I desire to testify unto all ... that I have most assuredly seen the plates from whence the Book of Mormon [was] translated, and that I have handled these plates, and know of a surety that Joseph Smith, jr. has translated the Book of Mormon by the gift and power of God. Then, in 1839, Turley reports Whitmer as making this statement:
Whitmer replied: ‘I now say, I handled those plates; there were fine engravings on both sides. I handled them;’ and he described how they were hung [on rings], and [said] ‘they were shown to me by a supernatural power;’ he acknowledged all. And then, in late 1877 or early 1878, Myron Bond reported Whitmer as saying:
John Whitmer told me last winter ... [that he] ‘saw and handled’ [the plates and] ... helped to copy [the Book of Mormon manuscript] as the words fell from Joseph’s lips by supernatural or [A]lmighty power. In each of these three statements, he declared that he both physically saw and handled the plates. Then he closed each statement by also testifying of the miraculous nature of the Book of Mormon. In the Turley incident, if it was reported accurately, he wasn’t saying that he didn’t literally see and handle the plates. He was saying that the plates themselves were miraculous. It was miraculous that Joseph received them, that he was able to translate them, and that Whitmer was allowed to see them for himself.
Again, situations like this are why we need to research these questions. If we only looked at one quote presented in a slanted manner, we wouldn’t know that this was a common pattern of Whitmer’s, and that he didn’t mean what Faulk implies he meant.
Why would a supernatural power be necessary if the plates actually existed? Couldn’t Joseph just invite the men he wanted to be witnesses over to his house, take the plates out of the box where he kept them and pass them around? That’s exactly what was done when the Eight Witnesses saw the plates. They went into the woods to do it, but Joseph is the one who handed the plates over to them and let them hold them and turn the leaves.
The Three Witnesses were a different story, but there’s a reason why they were shown the plates by an angel. If their testimony was exactly the same as that of the Eight Witnesses, critics could claim that Joseph just manufactured the plates himself and there was nothing miraculous about it. And if all of the testimonies were like that of the Three Witnesses, they could claim that the plates never actually existed and that Joseph made the entire thing up. But this way, it’s a lot harder to account for the two different types of testimony.
Why are visions and supernatural means necessary to see these plates? They weren’t. They are now, because the plates were returned to the Angel Moroni, but that wasn’t the case in 1829. They needed to pray for permission to see the plates, but they didn’t need to be shown them through miraculous means. The Three Witnesses were shown the plates by an angel to prove as true the Lord’s revelation that they had to see them by faith.
However, the two different types of testimony, one spiritual and one practical, make it that much harder to dismiss their testimonies. I have no doubt that was by design.
Published on Josephsmithpapers.org are the signed statements by the 3 and 8 witnesses. JosephSmithPapers reveals that both statements and all signatures are in the handwriting of Oliver Cowdery. The official statements printed in the Book of Mormon are not signed with original signatures, dated or given a specific location where the events occurred. The only surviving full copy of the Book of Mormon manuscript is the printer’s manuscript. It’s in Oliver’s handwriting because he copied it from the original manuscript so that they’d have two copies available.
In October of 1841, Joseph put the original copy in the cornerstone of the Nauvoo House. More than 40 years later, Emma’s second husband, Lewis Bidamon, made some renovations to the house and rediscovered it. It was badly damaged by water seepage and mold, and the Witness statements were some of the most damaged because they were at the back of the original Book of Mormon, not the front. Bidamon displayed the pages and gave many away to visitors to the house. Today, only about 28% of it is still intact, and even many of those pages and fragments are damaged. Extensive efforts to conserve them have been undertaken by both the Church and the Wilford Woodruff Museum, the two places where the bulk of the remaining pages survive. Private collectors have other additional fragments.
We have one statement from John Whitmer saying he signed the original copy, and three accounts of Joseph F. Smith saying that David Whitmer said he signed it as well (here, here, and here). There’s also a fourth David Whitmer account saying that Oliver copied their names onto the printer’s manuscript. Whitmer initially believed he had the original manuscript, which had previously been in Oliver’s possession until his death, but later came to accept that he had the printer’s copy.
Aside from the John Whitmer account, these are all secondhand reports, some given several decades later. As such, they should be treated with some skepticism. But, as most of them come from a prophet, I do personally lend them some weight and consider them to be pretty solid sources.
It’s true they’re not dated, but we know approximately when the experiences happened (in June of 1829) and where they happened. The Three Witnesses were shown the plates by the angel in the woods near the Whitmer home, while a few days later, the Eight Witnesses were shown them in the woods near the Smith home in Palmyra.
It should be noted that in John Whitmer’s final interview, published after his death, the details differ from the other accounts. He’s quoted as saying that he was shown the plates inside Joseph’s home, in two groups of four rather than all at once. However, this does conflict with other accounts, and David Whitmer publicly disputed the accuracy of the interview when it was published.
These are not 11 legally sworn statements; rather it seems possible that they are simple accounts pre-written, pre-signed and agreed upon at some later time. This is a comment ripped straight out of the CES Letter. No, these are not legally sworn statements, but who on earth ever claimed that they were? Why would anyone think that? There’s no notary information on the statement.
And obviously, the printer’s manuscript was pre-written and pre-signed, since it’s not the original manuscript. But nothing other than the content of the statement was agreed upon at a later time. They all declared repeatedly, until the end of their lives, that they experienced the things they testified in those statements that they experienced.
In addition, consider the statement by Martin Harris (one of the 3 witnesses): “…and also that the eight witnesses never saw them and hesitated to sign that instrument for that reason, but were persuaded to do it.” And, as we covered in the beginning of this post, that statement is suspect. It’s not a direct quote, it’s a summary from a hostile source’s letter—and that same letter said that Harris disavowed this statement.
Also, it’s worth pointing out that Martin Harris was not present when the Eight Witnesses handled the plates. He didn’t know what they experienced any more than we can. All any of us has to go on is their signed statement and the other comments they made about their experiences over the years. It’s not our place, and it’s certainly not Harris’s place, to redefine their experiences for them.
Reportedly this source document is printer’s manuscript and the original was only partially ruined, however the Church has never been able to produce the original. Oh, good heavens. Yes, this is the printer’s manuscript, as we went over, and yes, the original was mostly damaged. The Church has produced the original on the Joseph Smith Papers Project. However, they did not obtain it until 2017. Prior to that, it was owned by the RLDS/Community of Christ Church, and the Church could not publish it in full color due to copyright reasons. There was a black and white copy copyrighted to the Community of Christ available on the website before that point.
So, in wrapping this all up, there was a clear, consistent theme running throughout this entire post. Vet your sources, guys. People lie, they twist the facts, and they have agendas. Be aware of that, and do your homework. Yeah, it can take a long time to do that, I get it. But the truth is important. When we hear slanted rhetoric like this, it’s not always obvious what the truth really is. We have to put in the work to figure it out. The Lord rewards us when we do. Remember, it’s after the trial of our faith that the witness of the truth comes to us.
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2023.03.21 08:26 ItsEsmeJones [MM4F] Game Over [Lovers to Exes?][Drunk Negligent Boyfriend Speaker][Confident Frat Boy Speaker][Absolutely Done Listener][Ex Drama][Meet-Cute?][Fight][Argument][Absent][Supportive]vs[Absent][Choosing][CW: Mentions of Gaslighting/Theoretical Cheating/Break-Ups]
Context: Your boyfriend got out of a BAD relationship a good year before he met you. You helped him get back into a routine, get his life back, and slowly fell in love. Despite that, despite all of his good qualities, he is still wrapped up in his abusive ex to the point where you feel like he's about to gain one more.
Setting: A frat party
Tags:[MM4F][Lovers to Exes?][Drunk Negligent Boyfriend Speaker][Confident Frat Boy Speaker][Absolutely Done Listener][Ex Drama][Meet-Cute?][Fight][Argument][Absent][Supportive]vs[Absent][Choosing][CW: Mentions of Gaslighting/Theoretical Cheating/Break-Ups]
Usage: You may tweak or record this script. Gender flipping is OK! Please credit me if you use this script in any of your projects. If you would like to use this script for a paywalled recording, please note:
Monetization: All forms of monetization are OK with me! Youtube, Patreon, etc. I would appreciate being able to listen to the recording, if possible. Let me know if you have any questions. Thank you! Check out the rest of my scripts by using the Script Directory
[T] = Troy, your boyfriend [E] = Eamond aka 'E' aka frat boy friendo
[Scene opens at a frat party]
[SFX: Party music]
[You maneuver the inside of a frat house, looking for your boyfriend. It takes a few minutes of drunken bumping and a few cheeky gropes before you see him leaning against a wall in the kitchen]
[He smiles drunkenly as you approach him]
[T] “Baby! Hey! You made it!”
[His smile fades to confusion and then briefly to horrified realization]
[T] “Oh, uh… Yeah, I guess I did say I wouldn’t be at this party…”
[T] “Look, I just wanted to say bye to Mindy before she left the state, alright? That’s why I didn’t tell you… I knew you’d get mad for no good reason because, even though she’s my ex, I am not like that and you don’t need to worry about me being faithful, alright?”
[T] “I… A white lie once in a while doesn’t mean you can’t trust me!”
[T] “Yes, OK! Yes, I am aware this is the same Mindy that damned near broke me. This is for my sense of closure, OK? I just want to get it over with and then we can go home. That’s why I called you…”
[T] “Baby, c’mon… You trust me, don’t you? I’m not a cheater. I’m not the best at thinking things out, but I’d never hurt you like that.”
[T] “Just… gimme thirty minutes. Go sit in the living room, I’ll say my piece, and then we can go home. I’ll make it up to you then, alright?”
[Mindy joins the party, smug as ever. You show tremendous heroism in not socking her in her face]
[T] “Mindy, hey! Yeah, my girlfriend is just here to get me home once we’re done talking. Babe, some privacy, please? I’ll be done soon, I promise.”
[You inhale through your nose, turn and march into the rowdy living room]
[E, slightly muffled] “No, I’ve got the controllers, let me just get the console up, and then we can crash on the couch to play!”
[SFX: The couch creaking as the Listener sits]
[Listener had never heard such bullshit.]
[You’re sitting, stewing in rage when a handsome young man plops by your side]
[SFX: Couch plopping]
[E] “Pardon us, miss. We were just playing this game where you have to use plastic guns. Didn’t mean to disturb your, um… angry vibrating?”
[The man smiles]
[E] “Hey, if you want to play, go for it. We’ve been stuck on this insanely hard level for like thirty minutes. Have had to reset and reconnect the console like five times just from Josh raging. Try not to do it this time, eh, Josh?”
[He pauses. The other frat boys look taken aback as well]
[E] “...You heard her, Josh. Give her both guns.”
[SFX: The Listener clicking the triggers a few times/House of the Dead-style ambiance, or CarnEvil, if you’re a person of culture]
[E] “Ready, my friend?”
[E] “Alright… Let’s go!”
[SFX: Arcade shootout noises for a bit with the occasional impressed reactions from the fratties]
[E] “She’s killing it!”
[E] “No, seriously, that’s amazing! You’re in there with two Uzis like it is NO problem!”
[Before long, the frat boys are cheering you on as you mow down zombies, giant, mutant babies, etc. The occasional innocent blonde girl in a pink tube top, who’s counting?]
[E] “Almost… Almost, you just need one more hit on the Krampus boss!”
[E] “Oh man, oh man oh man! I feel like I’m starting to get vapors over here from Missus Cool Guy, hehe.”
[E] “Ohhh, Missus Cool Guy was your mom, huh? What do I call you, then?”
[SFX: Some more shots and victory noises]
[E] “Holy shit, I call you the fucking CHAMP is what I call you! Dual-wielding Queen, let’s hear, it boys!”
[You smile for the first time in…?]
[The handsome lad puts an arm around and draws you into his side]
[E] “Man! Glad you were here tonight, otherwise we might never have beaten the stupid game. Who invited you, by the way?”
[E] “...I see. That your boy over there with Mindy?”
[E] “Bet. What’s his name?”
[E] “Troy? Perfect. Boys, you know what to do.”
[You watch in confusion as all the frat boys take out some paper and start scribbling]
[E] “Why are they getting out paper and writing something down? You’ll see. Hey, Troy!”
[Your boyfriend turns towards you, confused]
[T] “Can I help you?”
[E] “Yeah. You got deep pockets?”
[E] “In your pants. You got deep pockets?”
[T] “Uhh…I guess?”
[The handsome man smirks and winks at you]
[E] “Good. She’s gonna need that much space to carry both all of these phone numbers and the amount of self-respect you’re displaying here. Here’s my number, sweetheart. My name is Eamond, by the way, but folks just call me ‘E’.”
[Your boyfriend turns red. You turn redder]
[T] “Excuse me?? What the fuck do you think you’re doing hitting on my girlfriend like that?!”
[E, feigning confusion] “Whaaaat, I thought that was your girl over there! Mindy, isn’t that your man?”
[The girl looks away, smugness crushed under embarrassment]
[T] “Mindy is my ex. I came here to say my goodbyes before she left to return for school.”
[E] “Oh, cool! Then your girl should be able to accept numbers from guys that want to keep in touch after she leaves, right?”
[Troy turns, eyes blistering with fury]
[T] “...Look, I don’t know what your deal is-”.
[E, coldly] “I think you do.”
[SFX: The party quieting a little]
[T] “...excuse me?”
[E] “You know what my deal is because I’m the guy that guys like you hate the most. The one that can’t leave things alone when they don’t feel right to me, and what you’re doing is, no offense, fucking gross. You’re off your ass drunk but you haven’t even been here that long, from what I can tell, so you either drove drunk or hitched a ride to come and get your ego stroked while your actual girlfriend came here to get you.”
[T] “Dude. You don’t know-”.
[E] “I know Mindy. Mindy is also my ex. She’s also, on top of all of that, a manipulative snake of a woman who one hundred percent aimed to seduce you tonight just to rub it in your girl’s face here. I bet she gave you the ol’ ‘save me’ story, made you feel all manly and stoic, like a real savior, and you probably get off feeling good at something, right?”
[SFX: Stomping and a door slamming shut]
[He rolls his eyes as Mindy storms from the now quiet room and slams the door shut behind her]
[E] “Yeah, you can eat my ass right back, Mindy! At least mine doesn’t have any plastic in it!”
[T] “You are pushing me over the fucking line, man! Mindy, wait!”
[Your boyfriend stops as you yell at him]
[T] “Babe, I HAVE to go after her, she could hurt herself!”
[E] “Doubtful. She’s just using you, dude. Meanwhile, your girlfriend is here, being awesome, and you’re throwing it away for someone that did you dirty… Be smart, here.”
[Troy looks from E to you, enraged and struggling]
[T] “...If I leave, are you seriously going to hold it against me?”
[T] “She could get hurt! She’s tipsy too, and if she tries to drive… I’d be a terrible person if I didn’t at least check on her, alright?”
[T] “Look, I… I have to go, OK? I’ll text you later!”
[He hurries out before you can comprehend what happened]
[E] “...Sorry for starting shit. I didn’t expect him to be that… wow. Just wow. Are you OK?”
[E] “...He’s a dick to treat you like that. I understand he’s concerned about Mindy, and that’s fine, but she still has him twisted up… While expecting you to carry the workload while he takes his sweet-ass time trying to get his shit together. I don’t doubt she hurt him, believe me, but… Listen, me and the boys are happy to hang. It looks like you could use a night off from any more drama.”
[E] “...If you want to work out some of that anger, there’s always laser paintball…”
[E] “Ohh yeah, they have great nachos.”
[E] “Yes! C’mon, boys, we have a nice lady to attend to. Let’s make it a night to remember, yeah?”
[They cheer, rowdy and obnoxious but… there. It’s a bitter feeling, leaving without your boyfriend, but you’re sure Mindy can take care of him just fucking fine.]
[To be continued]
Note: Apologies to all Mindys out there, I’m sure you are all nice, non-sociopathic peeps, for the most part.
submitted by ItsEsmeJones
to ASMRScriptHaven [link] [comments]
2023.03.21 08:26 ur_mom_lol6969 Mmmmmm... Wouldn't you like to know mr. snow golem.
Sometimes, when everyone goes to sleep at night. The dogs, the fish, the parents, and the birds, I log into minecraft and make a new world. I spend a few minutes thinking about what I should call this new world of mine. All my worlds are very special to me. They're like little snow globes I keep next to my windowsill like a lil Hawaiian woman on a truckers dashboard. When the world is loading, I twiddle my thumbs and kick my legs back and forth until my bulging eyes shoot back at the monitor in excitement. It is slow sometimes, so I whisper under my breath "Load little pixels. You can do it." As my character loads in, I am greeted with the soft flash bang of morning light. My bedroom doesn't see much of the sun, so my eyeballs are very sensitive, like a tooth slowly getting pulled out of your mouth by a sadistic dentist. I rest my hands on the laptop's tender touchpad and use my finger nails to tap the awsd keys. I move around a bit just so I am aware of my surroundings. I see the trees, the water, the mountains in the distance, and a few cute little farm animals. It makes me sad that they don't let me get near the farm animals in our barn, and I'm not sure why. I asked him so many times "dad, why can't I see the cow?" His face freezes and his right hand starts to shake. He says to me, "the cow? she's doing fine. I played a lil bit with her this morning after your mother left for her chemo fusion." Sometimes my dad doesn't face me when I'm talking to him. The bitter honey in the big glass has taught me to be very persistent when asking my dad questions. "dad, what do u mean you played with the cow?" My dad's leg jolted swiftly. "Oh, I just help her with some physical stimulation. After that bad accident she had, Ol Bessy hasn't been able to milk the same." Often, I think about what my dad says. I can't help but close my eyes and smile thinking about my dad caring for our poor old cow. When I'm at the facility, I tell my friends that my dad is like superman. When they hear that, some of them seem jealous that I have such a good dad. My friend told me that his dad worked in a laboratory making snow. He seemed like such a nice person providing our community with fake snow for when Santa comes to the mall. I often think about these moments when I'm playing minecraft because my parents have made my mind so empty. My dad isn't the best teacher when it comes to math home work. After building my house, I roam around looking for villages because you can find lots of good and cool stuff. I remember finding a blue horse thingy that goes on your pet horsey. When I lifted the horse thing out of the wooden chest, I overheard two villagers talking about an undocumented illegal alien coming into their village. I was confused because I didn't know there were aliens in minecraft. Anyways, after taking the horse thingy, I made my way out of the village. I arrived home a little bit late, but nonetheless fulfilled. Slowly opening my door to the right, shifted my view towards a white plane in the distance. "Wait, it can't be!" I screamed to myself. I hadn't realized that I was this close to a snowy place. I left my stuff in my house, closed the door, and walked to the snow. The sun was setting and I could feel the cold chills caressing my pale skin. The sun was descending and the moon was rising. The world's contrast transitioned smoothly into a shadowy cold abyss. Spirits were moon jumping around me and smiling as if I was a light-bearing messiah comforting them with the hope of having a second chance at heavenly eternity. Though they faded away back into an inter-dimensional chasm of monotonous melancholy, that did not stop me from treading on. The snow was teething at my sandal-wearing feet, but it was my sole imperative to explore this cold region. My feet started to become numb and swollen. It was as if both of my feet were amputated and I was wobbling and drudging along with stilts stabbed and drilled into my bones. The pain kept creeping up up legs, slowly making its way into my hips. I could no longer keep going. The teething had turned into consumption, and the nerves traveling down my legs felt like a streamline of lights being turned off one after the other. I couldn't. I just couldn't keep moving. It was way too freaking much! Sorry, my dad told me not to curse. I exhaled my last breath, tipped over, and planted face first into the snow. I didn't even get to find a snow golem and do what I wanted with him... which was physic- WELP, time to make a new world!
submitted by ur_mom_lol6969
to confessions [link] [comments]
2023.03.21 08:25 AS_25f Savings Account - Germany
Im looking for savings bank accounts to park my emergency fund (20k euros) and some cash savings (200 euros every month). Right now, I have it in my Tagesgeldkonto with nearly 0% interest.
Does someone have suggestions about better bank accounts that would at least give me some considerable interest?
I came across ING and Barclays so far, that give around 2% for new customers. Woud this be a good option for me? My requirement is that I should be able to withdraw the money in case of emergencies.
Thank you in advance!
submitted by AS_25f
to eupersonalfinance [link] [comments]
2023.03.21 08:23 Less_Nail5958 George and Bert coming very close to convincing me to stay in bed this morning… Norwegian Chonks not even pestering me for breakfast
2023.03.21 08:23 realvicandy Is getting a CS degree and becoming a programmer worth it in 2023 with Chat-GPT4?
I know this question has been asked a lot, but honestly, some of the responses feel like they were typed by Chat-GPT I.e. bot responses (forgive my bad joke).
I’m getting my CS degree and having a ton of fun with it and I’m really excited to be a programmer.
I just want to make sure that I will still have a job and not be professionally displaced in 20+ years. Then having to go learn a trade or something from scratch to be able to support my family.
My mind says either stick with the CS and programming, or ditch it early (which would make me sad bc it is a lot of fun for me) and learn a trade now so I can rack up the experience.
Twitter is going HAM right now on this topic, and it seems like everyone on there thinks everything in media and tech will be replaced by ML/AI in the near future.
I feel like this might just be a hype train and tons of wanna be influencers are jumping at the opportunity to write something they have little knowledge of.
That is why I ask that only experienced CS/IT professionals respond to this with their honest opinions.
All other people who don’t have 5+ years experience in the tech field, in a technical role, sit this one out with me.
submitted by realvicandy
to computerscience [link] [comments]
2023.03.21 08:20 jijithecat13 I (27F) haven't been able to date again since my ex. Where did I go wrong with this?
My ex and I were together for 3 years, which when your in your early 20's late teens. That's forever.
When we first met I was with another guy. My ex-boyfriend and I became best friends. We hung out, talked about gaming, although I tried to play off like I actually knew a bunch about it when I didn't trying to impress him. We did have a lot of shared interests and seemed very similar in personality.
I started catching feeling for him- my boyfriend at the time had been fizzling out over time and when I realized I wasn't in it I ended it. My ex and I got together a few months after that. Things were really good for the first year. then in the second it started to get shaky.
It first started with me feeling uncomfortable about the fact he was still in contact with his ex. I just got bad vibes. He gave me his Facebook password to see that there was nothing wrong, but there were MANY deleted messages. It was like the conversation didn't line up? Then he changed his password without telling me, which is fine but it just felt like he was hiding something.
Then I started noticing that this girl he hung out with, Emily, and he were always texting. They had many great jokes, it bordered on flirty. It made me feel even more insecure because he would flirt with me when I was with my ex before him, but then never act on it. It constantly straddled the line. I got jealous which is obviously bad.
He then went to her birthday without me. He said he'd be in contact and then ghosted me all night. I panicked and, not proud of it but I blew up his phone. This pattern then repeated. I would get insecure, we would maybe argue, maybe I would just say something to piss him off. He would ghost me for hours, days...
I tried to be really honest and say that I have a fear of abandonment and I was getting help. I told him I am not coping well with this, it sends me into a panic attack every time and I can't study or function. I said that I don't want to stop him taking time if he needs it, but could he just give me a timeline- like I'll be back at 7 or something. He said he understood and then never did this. Instead sending me a website about abusive traits saying he thinks our relationship is toxic and I am to blame...
I of course was completely distraught. I try to take time to myself, but he gets mad and then I can't contact him.
We work through that and I think things are better until one day I am coming into school and my professor stops me and asks me if I have heard what is going on. I reply no. She then proceeds to tell me that one of his female friends, Gemma, made very inappropriate jokes about something bad that happened to me when I was younger in a group chat. This is now all over the school. I leave crying, Nobody ever told me what it was in the chat but it was bad enough my professor wanted her expelled.
I go to my boyfriend, really upset, crying, He said it was a problem between me and her and he isn't going to stop being friends with her. I drop it because I am just going to get ignored again.
We eventually have a big fight over it however and he ignores me for hours. I decide F this and go to his house. He opens the door and slams it in my face initially, only to let me in, we argue then he physically pushed me out the door. I am not proud of it but I try holding on to him to get him to stop. I'm not trying to hurt him, just calm him down. He ignores me for 2 days.
Then she said he was going to Emilys dorm overnight to stay with her. I say I am not comfortable with that. He said there is obviously nothing in it since he told me. He wouldn't tell me if he was going to cheat. I say keep in touch since I don't want to be clingy like he says- I don't want to be abusive. He ends up not contacting me the entire time.
Then he was on a trip. He suddenly hung up on me because I made a joke that his sister and his best friend are probably going to be dating when he gets back. I meant it completely innocently as everyone knows they both like each other, including him. He just hung up and stopped replying. It was 3 days before I heard anything from him again. He broke up with me saying that I was too much, I was abusive and that I was basically a horrible human and he wished me luck in finding someone else, but he wasn't the one.
I was devastated. Months went by. I reached out trying to get some of my stuff back to never hear from him again. I thought this was it until 2 years later he and I ran into each other in the middle of a train station. He was with his new girl- but he immediately told me they weren't doing well and probably going to break up. He told me he missed me. He told me things like "You will always be in my life, I always want you in my life". He held my hand, hugged me and very nearly kissed me only to pull away. We met up twice. Then he ghosted me on the exact same freaking day he broke up with me before.
He then kept coming back. Over and over again. I kept taking him back because each time I thought it would be different. The final straw was when he told me to come back to our hometown to meet up only for me to find out he was moved in with the girl he told me he was breaking up with! I lost it and finally cut him out of my life myself.
Since then, and I am embarrassed to say how long its been, I haven't been brave enough to date. I want to, I am scared he was right and I am the problem. That I am the horrible person he said I was. Has anyone else experienced this? How do you move past it?
TDLR; My ex and I broke up a while ago but since them I haven't been able to move on, not from lack of wanting to but because I am scared I am everything he said I was. Advice?
submitted by jijithecat13
to relationships [link] [comments]
2023.03.21 08:19 oobiethoughts keeping gifts my ex gave me
basically i still have some clothes he gave me like gray sweatpants and this stranger things shirt cuz they’re just clothes to me. u know what i mean? most of the time i’m not thinking who gave it to me. i’m not gonna put any meaning to gray sweatpants. they’re just GRAY SWEATPANTS THAT ARE COMFORTABLE.
anyways now i am convinced i’m in love with my ex still just cuz i still have some gifted clothes from him. bro… well damn i’ll give them away then. it’s not a big deal if i lose them. as for my stranger things shirt, i wear it to bed. i just need something to sleep in bro. 99% of the time i am never thinking who gave me these shirts. FINE ILL GIVE THEM AWAY!!
submitted by oobiethoughts
to ROCD [link] [comments]
2023.03.21 08:18 National-Log6779 The UK's leading brand for aluminum doors and windows
Aluminium is a lightweight material with high strength that can be used in any aspect of modern construction. Aluminum doors are an excellent choice for all commercial buildings, from homes to hospitals to hotels. Aluminum can be used in any style of construction and matches perfectly with any color of the interior to create a limitless ambiance. Aluminium provides thermal insulation while also meeting building regulations due to properties such as anti-rusting versus iron doors and termite resistance versus wooden doors. Aluminum door also aids in the construction of frames with slim proles that look neat and tidy due to the strength-to-weight ratio and aid in the reduction of sightlines to maximize the view of your home or commercial premise.
submitted by National-Log6779
to u/National-Log6779 [link] [comments]
2023.03.21 08:18 Verifiedvenuz Why do some wooden/toy bricks have comparable weights to regular bricks?
Isn't it a safety risk?
Recalling getting one thrown at me as a kid and I'm realizing it was kinda weird how heavy it was in the first place. The difference seems to be about 3 pounds, with an average weight of 1.8 for wooden and 4.8 for regular. Obviously being a kid at the time meant my perception of its weight is distorted though.
submitted by Verifiedvenuz
to NoStupidQuestions [link] [comments]
2023.03.21 08:18 grm1808 Snore detection not working
I turned on snore detection in always mode on my samsung watch 4 and s health app in my s21 fe. I kept the phone near me while sleep. It never detected anything and did mot record anything even after repeating this for 4 to 5 times. Kindly advise the steps required to make snore detection work
submitted by grm1808
to galaxywatch4 [link] [comments]
2023.03.21 08:18 Ducks-go- Do you ever feel you get treated even more differently, rude or even aggressively by other males since transitioning?
I was in my boymode and this guy at the grocery stood close to me, aggressively take the vegetables away from me and nearly running me over with his folk lift. Never ever said a word. I wish I had said something but I was shaken up... I felt vulnerable and weak due to hrt.
submitted by Ducks-go-
to MtF [link] [comments]
2023.03.21 08:17 MsGamerMoose I had an attachment as a baby and now I think my daughter does too
Growing up, my mom used to tell me stories about a ghost attached to me as a baby. My room would be extremely cold when I was sleeping, to the point that my parents needed a jacket. When I’d lay in bed awake, if my parents didn’t come get me, things would be thrown around the house to get attention. I’d coo to the air and giggle like I was playing with someone behind them. They even caught pictures with light flares that were unexplainable around me.
So since the beginning, I’ve had paranormal experiences and am super sensitive to it. (I’ll be posting in this sub a lot, just to share experiences so I feel less anxious about it)
Now flash forward.
I (23F) am a mom to a wild child (2F). Since the beginning my experiences spiked but I thought nothing of it, since I heard having a baby can make someone already sensitive even more open to the paranormal. But in the last year, it’s progressed.
At 8 months, my daughter slept in her room and I was in the kitchen. I had an audio only baby monitor next to me. My baby started whining as she woke up from her nap but I didn’t get her immediately, as she usually started to go back to sleep for a bit, and decided to continue washing dishes. Suddenly I heard a woman’s voice through the monitor comforting my baby and even using her name. We were home alone, and new to the area so nobody knew us,so I sprinted as fast as I could to find nobody in her room or even outside.
A week later, playing on the living room floor, she played with a toy and looked up at me before looking over my shoulder and down the hallway. She began to babble and giggle. I turned to see what she was looking at in time to see a shadow of a head shape duck into her room. Again, we were home alone and nobody was found in her room.
When she was 11 months, we moved into my Bf’s apartment. I thought it was done but I was horribly wrong… it started with footsteps and shadows darting around the corner to her room. Then it was knocking and tapping on the walls and door. When she slept, it growled at, or loudly hushed,me if I passed her door. It even yanked the door out of my hand so aggressively that it bruised my hand and pulled a muscle in my shoulder. If I was alone, it’d exhale in my ear or chase me down the hallway with loud running footsteps as the hallway got darker around me. One night, I took a picture of her and caught a Smokey face next to her.
When we moved into our house last April, i cleansed the house we were moving into and everyone moving in. But it’s only gotten worse. Doors rattle and open or shut. There’s sounds everywhere and shadows darting around. But it’s even more terrifying now.
A couple months ago, my little girl was shoved five feet across the room onto her butt. I cleansed and it calmed for awhile. Then, the mimicking started.
When my baby isn’t home, I hear her calling for mommy from across the house. Recently, her voice comes from her room while she is sleeping. The first night, her voice called for mommy but I could hear her snoring and see her asleep on her new baby monitor. The second night, her monitor lit up, notifying me that there were sounds in her room and drawing my attention to her sleeping soundly, before her voice let out a terrified scream. Both nights, I couldn’t find an explanation.
As of now, she tells me that she “talked to the ghost” when she gets out of bed. Sometimes she walks around asking “where the ghost go?”
I have so many stories to tell and details to add to this one. I just needed to share so I feel less crazy and anxious.
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to Paranormal [link] [comments]
2023.03.21 08:17 depressed_jellybear Thoughts on this?
After my last post and having my mum refuse to hug me and told me to return my gift to her, she came into my room at 6am stared at me until she knew I was awake and said to hop in bed with me. I was half asleep so didn't fight it and spooned her.
I felt so awkward and felt nothing towards her at all. After an hour of feeling trapped next to her she got up then said sorry. Then nothing.
Didn't say why she was sorry to me and I'm still confused as to why she got into bed with me, I'm not sure If she's being manipulative or what but at 6am i wasnt going to be thinking straight.
It was very unusual for her to do that so now I don't know how to feel.
submitted by depressed_jellybear
to raisedbynarcissists [link] [comments]
2023.03.21 08:16 purlgraytea Struggling to keep my life together
I’m a fifth year at a university and I live off campus. To afford rent I need to work nearly full time and to graduate I need to be over full time units. I know people have to do this and some have children. I know I don’t have it that hard.
I feel like I’m constantly being pulled in seventeen directions. I’ve had to drop out of school twice. Lately one of my roommates has mentioned that we (my other roommates and I) aren’t living up to the expectations that we set when we moved in and that the house isn’t up to her standards of cleanliness. I’m really happy she came to me. I want her to feel comfortable voicing her problems so I can fix them. But I’m at the cleanest I can be. I do dishes 3 times a day, I pick up after myself as much as I can. I’m not perfect, but I’m also not that messy. I’ve tried to be better but she keeps finding things I’m doing wrong.
My ADHD paralysis has never been this strong. It’s finals week and all I have left is one 5 page paper. That’s it. But I just lay in my bed imagining it. And sleeping. I can’t focus on anything. It’s hard to shower and brush my teeth.
I’m not trying to come off as woe is me. I know it could be worse. I just feel like I’m suffocating. I can’t complete one task without finding 15 other ones.
I have so so much debt from school and I need my degree to get a job so pay that debt but I think I may need to drop out again. I don’t know what to do. I’m losing all financial support from my parents including their co-signing the new lease and school loan, so I don’t even know if I can continue living and learning where I am.
I don’t know why I’m posting this. I feel like I just keep hitting rock bottom over and over again.
submitted by purlgraytea
to adhdwomen [link] [comments]
2023.03.21 08:15 Avengerwolf626 Missing school... Again
I'm in so much pain. I'm 18 and I have exams coming up but there's no way I'm going to school today. The pain is just two bad. I don't think I'm even going to get much study done from home at this point I can't stand for long at all. I've taken as many pain killers as I can and I'm really hoping they start to work because I'm sick of spending entire days like this just trapped in bed. I just want to not be like this anymore. Or to at least confirm that it is endo despite my doctors skepticism (they incist its mild pcos and I'm exaggerating) I don't know what to do anymore. I already have 4 other conditions I can't afford to go private again and my doctors won't refer me a gyno. I'm suffering and so tired of this. I feel like I'm wasting my education but I know I can't go in if I'm just going to end up on the floor of the office in pain unable to walk. (wouldn't be the first time) I just don't know what to do anymore.
submitted by Avengerwolf626
to Endo [link] [comments]
2023.03.21 08:15 xlsdeax Is it normal to feel really deeply for someone after a month ?
I (21f) have had very minimal partners in my life, mainly due to avoiding relationships to work through trauma, and become my best version before I get into a relationship, and for the first time I feel like I’m genuinely falling for someone (33m). We’ve been in an exclusive relationship for a month, and he treats me like an absolute princess, but I’m scared that falling for someone this quickly isn’t normal.. We talk everyday, and If I go more than a few days without seeing his silly ass, I start missing him tremendously, and I’m not used to that.. He is the kindest, sweetest man I’ve had in my life. He’s intellectual, calm, guides me, and gives me life advice, we get along so well, but I’m scared that falling for someone this quickly isn’t normal, and this man runs multiple companies, and has many people leaning on him, and the last thing I want is to get in the way, or become a burden in his life with my mental health. I could spend hours just wasting time with him laughing, and I can really see myself building a future with him, but damn.. it’s only been like 6 weeks ??? Is this unhealthy, or is it normal, and I’m just over thinking 😭 ?? I told him I think we should take a step back from pursuing a relationship because I don’t wanna become needy for his time, or energy, and add stress to his life. I feel like my feelings for anyone should not be this deep after just over a month. I don’t think it’s normal to be damn near falling in love that fast, and I don’t wanna get in the way of his life, or let it grow to a genuinely unhealthy extent where it could possibly turn into codependency.
submitted by xlsdeax
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2023.03.21 08:12 2xal2ax 16, Cannot Stop Whatsoever.
I've been heavily addicted to porn since I was 12 and I have been watching it pretty much every day since then. Throughout those years I've seen reasons why it's bad for me, reasons why it's good for me, reasons to stop, reasons to keep going, ect, ect. And throughout all of that I have not been able to go even a month without committing the act. It's only been since October 2022 when I've really actually tried to stop, 100% knowing how much damage it was actually doing for my mental health, knowing that there were 0 positives to watching it. I was able able to make it 16 days in during November, getting a lot of help from being on vacation not able to masturbate in the same hotel room as my family members, but only after being home for a week I fell right back into the loop. I was able to quit for 14 days again about a month afterwards, but since then I've been masturbating pretty much every day consistently.
I've tried nearly every method you could probably think of for stopping, and none of them seem to work. I've tried exercising once I get an urge, I've tried self-restricting access to all nsfw websites, masturbating less overtime instead of completely stopping, masturbating without substance, limiting access to services that could lead to urges, distracting myself with other activities as soon as I get an urge, but none of this shit works. I always come back somehow, and it doesn't ever go away. It's gotten so bad to the point where as soon as I get an urge, there is absolutely nothing that can stop the urge from staying until I climax. I will have entire 4 hour periods of wanting to masturbate, abstaining the best I can, and then eventually just giving in after I use up all of my willpower.
There's no way in fucking hell I would want my parents to know about this, so there's no chance of me getting some kind of rehabilitation for it, and every time I try to get support from my friends, talking about it with them just makes me think about more. Can you guess what me thinking about porn more often does when I have a really bad addiction to it? I guess all I'm trying to say is I don't know how to overcome this, and it honestly feels like I'm not going to be able to no matter my hatred for it all. If you can give me some advice, please feel free.
submitted by 2xal2ax
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2023.03.21 08:11 ThrowRA9322 I (26M) just found out my long time friend turned FWB (27F) is an escort.. I don't know what to do?
Throwaway account to protect my and her identity.
I (26M) have been friends with (27F) since sophomore in high school. After high school we went our separate ways, I went to another city for college and she went to a local community college, we were still texting and whenever I came back to visit my family, I would also hang out with her. Fast forward, I just got back from finishing a contract overseas. I came back at the beginning of this month, so I invited her for dinner. When we were drinking at my house, she was wondering if I had a crush on her when we were young, I said yes and she felt the same, but we already know we weren't going to work out because we want different things, for example, I want to get married, have kids, have two dogs. She doesn't like to follow societal norms and is allergic to dogs which are deal breakers for me, so I suggested we become FWB, and she agreed.
Three hours ago, I was bored and went to my best friend's house to watch an NBA game. While the commercials were on, he was looking at an escort site and I managed to peek at one of the pictures and noticed my FWB has the same necklace, same bed, and same tattoo as in the picture. To be honest, I don't know what to do, I feel nauseous and my heartbeat was just beating fast and I rushed to go home. I remembered while driving that she has two phones, and went to another state for vacation but probably for "work". I still don't know what to do... We practiced unprotected sex, I ate her out, and she encouraged me to do anal because I haven't tried it yet and I did it without protection. I feel like I messed up, I messaged "Hey" after I got back home and I haven't received a reply yet, now I'm thinking if she's probably doing her "work". I don't know if I should even bring up the fact that she's an escort. She used to be a nurse and she's on leave due to mental health. I'm stressed out, I don't even know if I'm still clean and to be honest I liked being friends with her... even before the whole FWB situation... Can I please get advice before I dive in and start conversating with her?
I'm sorry for the horrible grammar, I rushed to type this.
tl;dr: Long time friend turned into FWB, I found out she's an escort, she didn't tell me. I don't know what to do, should I confront her? should I keep quiet and just get tested to keep the friendship and remove the benefits part?
submitted by ThrowRA9322
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2023.03.21 08:11 ShortAndSad4381 My narcissist mother doesn't care for me, manic post, redditors were right about her.
That's basically it. I've been treated like I'm nothing but a nut case, I get ignored constantly, and like in my previous post. I said all I wanted for my birthday was to spend time with my mom, brother, and nieces. It's in two days now, and despite many efforts to help everyone make the time I'll still be alone.
I'm tired of being treated like I'm crazy whenever I feel any emotion aside from being happy, I'm tired of being screamed at when things go wrong and hit when I try to tell them the truth (or get threatened). I'm tired of watching my body decay, and my teeth rot out and not even being able to make myself a dentist appointment because I don't have phone service or a home phone. I'm tired of not having running water because every time I save the money to get our water turned on my mom takes it from me because either she or the kids need it. Most of all in tired of having to shout just for someone to realize I'm still alive and I'm starving myself, torturing myself, and letting myself die just so they can do what they want and be happy.
I live with my mom because of many reasons. The main one being my physical health is so bad I can hardly make it out of bed most days, but it doesn't do much good. I haven't eaten in days, and all my money is taken from me so I can't order myself food. I haven't bathed in god knows how long and everytime I buy bottled water to use to get clean my mom hides it so she can use it to make coffee with. I have to go through an argument with her, being threatened by my brother to get locked in the same mental health facility I was sexually abused in just to get a goddamn bath.
My family doesn't care about me, and i doubt they ever will. My mother is a vulnerable narcissist who's manipulated my brother and I our entire lives, and now that I'm old enough to realize what she's doing it's too late. She already ruined me. I don't even know my own social security number and she won't let me get it because "you're not good enough with numbers" to be trusted with my own social security number.
I woke up crying because of how badly my teeth hurt where I can't even get a dentist appointment because she won't let me keep my own money long enough to get phone service to call them, or much less pay for the dentists bills, and I'm too old for my Medicaid to pay for anything but my teeth to be pulled. So I've done nothing but cry for the last hour trying to make the pain in my jaw go away but it isn't working. I just want to keep my teeth so I don't look like a junkie, I want to eat something so my stomach will stop growling and I can have the energy to get out bed, and I want so desperately to move out and get away from her and the rest of my family who treat me like IM crazy because I've become manic over the years of constant physical abuse, but I can't even buy myself a goddamn burger since my mom has so much control over my life now that my cancer has left me bedridden most days.
submitted by ShortAndSad4381
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2023.03.21 08:11 FLOOPYG00BER Repair of frames/glasses
Hi I am in desperate need of some aid. My frames broke today and I am not able to use my glasses.
Do you happen you know know and can you recommend any place in Seoul that repairs frames? One alternative is self-repair which I am willing to try, but I would need some kind of suitable glue - any repair shop might point me in the right direction there.
I live in Dongjak-Gu and frequent Gangnam, so prefferably something in either of those areas.
submitted by FLOOPYG00BER
to seoul [link] [comments]